{"id":884,"date":"2025-06-03T07:40:31","date_gmt":"2025-06-02T19:40:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?p=884"},"modified":"2025-06-03T07:58:56","modified_gmt":"2025-06-02T19:58:56","slug":"i-asked-queen-elizabeth-ii-if-she-had-any-advice-for-me-jacinda-ardern-on-her-time-as-a-pregnant-prime-minister","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?p=884","title":{"rendered":"\u2018I asked Queen Elizabeth II if she had any advice for me\u2019: Jacinda Ardern on her time as a pregnant prime minister"},"content":{"rendered":"<div id=\"attachment_887\" style=\"width: 650px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-887\" class=\"wp-image-887 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-1024x819.jpg\" alt=\"Ardern and her partner Clarke Gayford at Buckingham Palace during the Commonwealth heads of government meeting, 2018. Photograph: Daniel Leal-Olivas\/AP\" width=\"640\" height=\"512\" srcset=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-1024x819.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-300x240.jpg 300w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-768x614.jpg 768w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-1536x1229.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-150x120.jpg 150w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1-400x320.jpg 400w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-1.jpg 1900w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-887\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Ardern and her partner Clarke Gayford at Buckingham Palace during the Commonwealth heads of government meeting, 2018. Photograph: Daniel Leal-Olivas\/AP<\/p><\/div>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.theguardian.com\/global\/2025\/may\/31\/queen-elizabeth-ii-had-raised-children-in-the-public-eye-i-asked-if-she-had-any-advice-for-me-an-exclusive-extract-from-jacinda-arderns-memoir\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Source<\/a><\/p>\n<p>In an exclusive extract from her new memoir, the former New Zealand PM remembers coping with pregnancy while new in the job \u2013 and what the monarch said to her.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\"><span class=\"dcr-15rw6c2\">T<\/span>here was one cheerful and imperfect baby blanket that stood out when it arrived in the post. It was made up of 24 squares, bright blocks of colour, each crafted with simple, uneven purl stitches. Looking at it, I could imagine the small hands still learning to master their needles and could almost hear the adult voice leading them. \u201cThe prime minister is having a\u00a0baby. Shall our class make a gift for her family?\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">The response to the announcement about my pregnancy in January 2018 was almost overwhelming. It began with so many emails. In the 24 hours after the news broke, the person who managed correspondence for me said she\u2019d never seen such an influx.<\/p>\n<aside class=\"dcr-nyoej5\" data-spacefinder-role=\"inline\">\n<h4 class=\"dcr-zzndwp\">I had braced for the worst. I was a public figure, used to judgment and scrutiny. Now I was pregnant and unwed<\/h4>\n<\/aside>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">Handmade gifts arrived at the office, too. The correspondence team created a\u00a0display table, and within days it overflowed.<\/p>\n<div class=\"ad-slot-container \"><\/div>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">I had braced for the worst. I was a public figure, used to judgment and scrutiny. Now I was pregnant and unwed. I was also new to the job. If people wanted to have a go at me, they had plenty of reason to. But I hadn\u2019t considered a fundamental truth: that politicians are humans first, and perhaps the public hadn\u2019t lost sight of that. And so maybe in the beautiful country of\u00a0New Zealand, the happy news of a baby could be just that: happy.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">But for all this support, my pregnancy added a\u00a0new kind of pressure. I was only the second world leader in history to have a baby in office. The first was Benazir Bhutto. She was the first woman to lead Pakistan, and in 1990, two years into her first term in office she had a baby girl. I didn\u2019t think the world\u2019s eyes were on me, but I did think naysayers\u2019 were. Those who might be waiting to say: See, you can\u2019t do a demanding job like that and be a mother.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">Not long after I\u2019d made my announcement, I was at an event, speaking with a woman who\u2019d had an impressive career in the corporate sector. While we were talking, I\u2019d forgotten something minor \u2013 a\u00a0word, or a name, perhaps \u2013 and I\u2019d laughed off my memory lapse. \u201cBaby brain,\u201d I said.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">She hadn\u2019t laughed. Her eyes were serious, her voice firm. \u201cYou absolutely cannot say that.\u201d She was warning me: if you give your opponents any opening whatsoever, they will use your pregnancy to say that you \u2013 or any woman \u2013 shouldn\u2019t be given a\u00a0position of authority. I knew this, but suddenly I was reminded how easy such a lapse could be. From then on, I treated my pregnancy like a test, a set of hurdles to get through without breaking a sweat.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_886\" style=\"width: 650px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-886\" class=\"size-large wp-image-886\" src=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-1024x683.jpg\" alt=\"Attending Polyfest \u2013 the largest Polynesian festival in the world \u2013 in Auckland, March 2018. Photograph: Hannah Peters\/Getty Images\" width=\"640\" height=\"427\" srcset=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2-400x267.jpg 400w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-2.jpg 1900w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-886\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Attending Polyfest \u2013 the largest Polynesian festival in the world \u2013 in Auckland, March 2018. Photograph: Hannah Peters\/Getty Images<\/p><\/div>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">By March, I was six months pregnant on a Pacific mission with a group of delegates to Tonga, Samoa, Niue and the Cook Islands. The goal was to position New Zealand as the Pacific nation we were, shifting the relationship with these countries away from a donor and recipient dynamic toward one of partnership.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">The media were with us around the clock. They travelled on the plane with me. They were on the ground with me, at every event, meeting and meal. I decided that if they were going to be my constant companions, then I would show them, pregnancy or not, that I had stamina.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">The air was sweltering throughout the tour, and at one press conference I could see streaks of sweat trickling down journalists\u2019 faces. I was dressed modestly, my arms and knees covered, and before long my feet began to swell, and my shoes dug into my skin painfully. Rather than wrap things up, I kept going until there were no more questions, long after the time available had passed. Only then, when I was certain I hadn\u2019t been the one to cave, I hobbled away to shove my feet into a cold bath.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">A month later, now seven months pregnant, I\u00a0picked up a letter from my obstetrician confirming,\u00a0should an airline ask, that I was fit to fly\u00a0so late in my pregnancy. The Commonwealth heads of government meeting (Chogm) was being held in London. Queen Elizabeth II, our head of state, would preside over it. We gathered at Buckingham Palace for the opening session and a\u00a0formal photo. Before the leaders filed into the room with its bright red carpet, white and gold pillars framing the royal ensign that hung as a backdrop, ushers ordered us into lines. I jokingly asked whether the lines would be organised \u201cboy, girl, boy, girl\u201d. They looked at me for a moment, perhaps trying to decide whether to take the comment seriously, before moving on to the next leader. Of course I hadn\u2019t been serious. There were 53 leaders at the meeting. Only five of us were women.<\/p>\n<h4>Clarke relished being in the group of international leaders\u2019 spouses. He enthusiastically joined the formal programme, which included afternoon teas and garden tours<\/h4>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">My partner, Clarke, meanwhile, was having the inverse experience, as one of very few men in the group of international leaders\u2019 spouses, and he was relishing it. He enthusiastically joined the formal spousal programme, which included afternoon teas and garden tours. He made a studious effort to get to know \u201cthe wives\u201d. One night, I told Clarke I needed to have a conversation with a leader I had been struggling to connect with. \u201cWell, if it helps,\u201d he told me, \u201chis wife has an extensive orchid collection.\u201d<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">The opening night for the meeting was a formal affair. To accommodate my bump, I\u2019d had a gown specially made by a New Zealand designer, Juliette Hogan \u2013 a flowy mustard number, which I wore with a k\u0101kahu, a traditional M\u0101ori cloak woven from flax and covered with feathers. Next to me, Clarke, who hadn\u2019t even owned a suit when we first met, looked handsome in his tuxedo. As we walked through the halls of Buckingham Palace, we marvelled at the beauty and the history of everything we saw. I looked over at him. He was every bit the statesman, but just 20 minutes earlier he\u2019d been standing in front of a mirror and screaming blue murder at the person back in New Zealand who told him a freestyle bow tie was a good idea.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_885\" style=\"width: 650px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-885\" class=\"wp-image-885 size-large\" src=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-1024x682.jpg\" alt=\"With Queen Elizabeth II, 2018. Photograph: WPA\/Getty Images\" width=\"640\" height=\"426\" srcset=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-1024x682.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-1536x1023.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-150x100.jpg 150w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3-400x267.jpg 400w, https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja-3.jpg 1900w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><p id=\"caption-attachment-885\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">With Queen Elizabeth II, 2018. Photograph: WPA\/Getty Images<\/p><\/div>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">That was life in those first few months: incredible,\u00a0unreal moments, mixed in with the daily\u00a0reality of having a job to do. Like any job, there was a\u00a0tremendous amount to get done: papers to sign, press conferences, events, shoes to strap on, bow ties that won\u2019t do up. It was all still life \u2013 just a\u00a0very different one.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">While in London, we met Queen Elizabeth. She had, of course, raised children in the public eye, so in our private meeting I asked if she had any advice. \u201cYou just get on with it,\u201d she said simply. She sounded so matter of fact, just as my grandma Margaret might have.<\/p>\n<p class=\"dcr-16w5gq9\">I squeezed the package I was holding, a gift for the\u00a0queen. It was a framed image of her during a\u00a0royal tour to New Zealand in 1953, her head back in\u00a0a full relaxed laugh. You just get on with it. Of\u00a0course you do.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>But for all this support, my pregnancy added a new kind of pressure. I was only the second world leader in history to have a baby in office. The first was Benazir Bhutto. She was the first woman to lead Pakistan, and in 1990, two years into her first term in office she had a baby girl. I didn\u2019t think the world\u2019s eyes were on me, but I did think naysayers\u2019 were. Those who might be waiting to say: See, you can\u2019t do a demanding job like that and be a mother. <span style=\"color:#777\"> . . . &rarr; Read More: <a href=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?p=884\">\u2018I asked Queen Elizabeth II if she had any advice for me\u2019: Jacinda Ardern on her time as a pregnant prime minister<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7408,"featured_media":891,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"episode_type":"audio","audio_file":"","podmotor_file_id":"","podmotor_episode_id":"","cover_image":"","cover_image_id":"","duration":"","filesize":"","filesize_raw":"","date_recorded":"","explicit":"","block":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[108],"tags":[],"series":[],"class_list":["post-884","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-politics","odd"],"episode_featured_image":"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/uploads\/ja3141-1-e1748894322763.jpg","episode_player_image":"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/wp-content\/plugins\/seriously-simple-podcasting\/assets\/images\/no-album-art.png","download_link":"","player_link":"","audio_player":false,"episode_data":{"playerMode":"dark","subscribeUrls":{"apple_podcasts":{"key":"apple_podcasts","url":"","label":"Apple Podcasts","class":"apple_podcasts","icon":"apple-podcasts.png"},"stitcher":{"key":"stitcher","url":"","label":"Stitcher","class":"stitcher","icon":"stitcher.png"},"google_podcasts":{"key":"google_podcasts","url":"","label":"Google Podcasts","class":"google_podcasts","icon":"google-podcasts.png"},"spotify":{"key":"spotify","url":"","label":"Spotify","class":"spotify","icon":"spotify.png"}},"rssFeedUrl":"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?feed=podcast&podcast_series=exposures-the-blog","embedCode":"<blockquote class=\"wp-embedded-content\" data-secret=\"4FePqPJgz4\"><a href=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?p=884\">\u2018I asked Queen Elizabeth II if she had any advice for me\u2019: Jacinda Ardern on her time as a pregnant prime minister<\/a><\/blockquote><iframe sandbox=\"allow-scripts\" security=\"restricted\" src=\"https:\/\/exposures.co.nz\/?p=884&#038;embed=true#?secret=4FePqPJgz4\" width=\"500\" height=\"350\" title=\"&#8220;\u2018I asked Queen Elizabeth II if she had any advice for me\u2019: Jacinda Ardern on her time as a pregnant prime minister&#8221; &#8212; Exposures - The Blog\" data-secret=\"4FePqPJgz4\" frameborder=\"0\" marginwidth=\"0\" marginheight=\"0\" scrolling=\"no\" class=\"wp-embedded-content\"><\/iframe><script type=\"text\/javascript\">\n\/* <![CDATA[ *\/\n\/*! 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